No one likes to be the only one to end a relationship, no matter what. When it comes to breaking up a long-distance relationship, it doesn’t make things any easier! There are different choices available to you on how to end your relationship at a distance. A test that is not easy, but often oh so necessary. Here is the proof that a breakup and a long-distance relationship are not incompatible!
How to leave him/her remotely?
How to break up at a distance: different solutions
1. Breaking up face to face, not always possible
If you absolutely can’t imagine ending your long-distance relationship via phone, computer, or carrier pigeon, waiting to see your future ex in real life is an option. However, it’s important to consider things like the cost of travel : you wouldn’t want your partner to pay to come see you just to be left!
Anyway, if this is not too restrictive for you, it may be a good option. Bringing up the breakup face-to-face with your partner might not be easy, but it’s the most humane way to present the reasons for your separation for your long-distance relationship.
2. Break up by SMS or E-mail
In a long-distance relationship, many choose to simply cut someone they don’t want out of their lives in a “radio silence” way , but don’t be that person.
So yes, we know that a breakup by SMS, email or text is not recommended and often mocked. But sometimes, thousands of kilometers separate the two partners, and you can’t afford to go back and forth and fly over the seas to leave your boyfriend! Instead, text her to say, “I’d like to talk about our relationship. Do you have free time later?”. This wording opens the door to discussing separation , so it’s not entirely unexpected.
3. Breaking up over the phone: the best way to end a long-distance relationship
If you can’t end a relationship in person, talking on the phone is still the best option . It’s a much more personal way of communicating a message than text or email, although breaking up by text is still an option – especially in abusive relationships or with anxious people.
Pay attention to your partner’s schedule, too . Is there a major exam coming up? Did he just get fired from his job? Is he going through a difficult period (mourning, accident, illness, etc.). If so, it is better to wait a few days . You would wish the same if the situation were reversed, wouldn’t you?
4. Skype, Line, WhatsApp: break up in video call
If you used to make frequent video calls, leaving your boyfriend or girlfriend on video call may be a possible solution… but also very trying. It is indeed a rather unnatural solution between two, but is still the closest thing to a separation announced face to face .
This allows you to see the person’s emotions, so that they can see you too, which shows a form of respect . However, the unhuman side of the video call can be frightening, and it is more difficult to leave your partner when you see him on a screen. Mixed review, it’s up to you!
5. The breakup letter: an authentic way to end your long-distance relationship
The breakup letter is an ideal way to keep a certain distance , not to have to face your ex. It has an authentic character, more poetic, but less direct. This can be a good option if you know the person you’re dealing with is bloodthirsty in nature, and won’t let you speak or hang up on the phone.
If you choose to write a letter to your ex, take the time to write it in handwriting : your partner will know that you spent time, even for this breakup, doing things right.
To end a long-distance relationship, be true to yourself!
Every relationship is different, a breakup is just as different. During your long-distance relationship, did you only communicate by phone? Sending a breakup letter might then seem impersonal to your ex. You know he never reads his texts? Avoid leaving it this way, there could be a misunderstanding…
If possible, rather than declaring it overnight, try to test the waters , to induce seeds of ideas beforehand. The fall will be less harsh. And who knows, talking about it might make the person change your mind?
Explain the reasons for your breakup
Don’t leave your ex-partner in the dark: allow him to understand the reasons for this breakup, by explaining it to him. Is he too jealous or possessive? Was the distance really starting to weigh on you too much? Did you lack communication in your relationship? Whatever the reasons , take the time to discuss it, discuss the subject, and the future of your relationship in the broadest sense. do you want to stay friends? correspond from time to time? So many questions that it happens to ask two.
And after the breakup?
After all your preparation, it’s not uncommon to be worried about breaking up at a distance when the time comes , not to dare. Talk about it around you with a confidant (your best friend, your mother, your therapist, etc.). Don’t be afraid to open up to them . Having someone there to help you will make this ordeal less difficult.
Relationships are extremely personal and unique to each couple. Breakups are no different. Trust your instincts and know that you have to do what’s best for you. Surround yourself as well as possible to mourn your long-distance relationship.