Difficult long distance relationship, what to do?

Sometimes the distance seems insurmountable but it is not. Admittedly, the long-distance relationship has its inevitable share of constraints, but you just need to know how to manage them… And you can learn it! All you have to do is set up tricks and change your way of being a little to compensate for the absence of your sweetheart or your prince charming. Some advice to overcome all the difficulties of long-distance love.

Holding together despite the distance – Instructions for use

Difficult long-distance relationship: ask yourself the right questions

If you have a bad relationship with your couple from a distance, it is important to ask yourself why it is so complicated for you. Putting words on a problem helps to find solutions to it. Take stock with yourself. What is really difficult for you in this relationship? There are no wrong answers, so pull out a piece of paper and write down everything that comes to mind on the subject.

  •  Is there a lack of communication in your relationship?
  • Is this your very first relationship? Maybe you lack experience
  • Do you often argue?
  •  Are you or your partner too possessive? Jealous ?
  •  Do you suffer from lack of sex?
  • Is the gaze of others too heavy?
  • What makes you sad? Get on your nerves?
  • Are you naturally pessimistic?
  • Is your budget preventing you from seeing each other?
  • Don’t you have anything in common with your partner?

Do not hesitate to suggest to your boyfriend / girlfriend at a distance to ask these same questions. You are two players on the same team . And maybe this long-distance couple adventure is also difficult for him/her!

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Make an action plan for a better long distance relationship

Now that you know better the reasons why you find this relationship so difficult, it’s time to establish an action plan ! Any problem can be solved. whether it’s changing your mindset, adopting a new behavior, or letting your partner change it. Make a small list of simple actions to implement. For example :

  •  Commit to messaging each other more
  •  Leave your ego aside and both be a little less stubborn
  • Discuss your fears, your desires
  • Cure your jealousy
  • Talk a little more about sex or redefine the rules
  • Learn to stop worrying about what other people think
  • Put some money aside so you can see each other
  • Do new activities to get to know your partner better

Small daily actions can lead to big changes . Do not underestimate the impact of your efforts on your relationship as a couple.

Long distance love is always a risk

…Like any relationship! Long distance relationships are tough but worth it. It can be hard to live with being deprived of the daily comfort of your darling. In a couple at a distance. We must quickly realize that efforts will be necessary , and above all compromises.

It is important not to idealize the situation too much , to disconnect from your daily and professional activities, to spend too long hours talking. We end up feeling tired and wanting to move on. Very quickly, you will have to clarify in which category to place your relationship, to specify the expectations of one towards the other. Everyone’s loyalty will be put to the test, especially if the relationship was not built on a strong emotional bond, but on the basis of carnal pleasure.

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Distance, a cement for the couple

The distance from the loved one is not easy to manage, but it can prove to be a catalyst to rekindle your momentum for each other. Sometimes when we live together, routine sets in and we get used to each other. But as soon as he or she is not there, we feel his absence, the emptiness is so obvious, our guts tighten and thoughts fly towards him/her like carrier pigeons.

The flame is rekindled, and the relationship takes on a facelift. The opportunities to get together are all the more sparkling! When we finally see each other, the desire is rekindled and the tenderness is expressed by countless hugs. These precious little moments make long distance relationships less difficult. In any case, there is sincerity in the attention we pay to each other.

Maintaining communication contact, an essential element

It is touching to see that your partner devotes enough attention to you to find the time to chat with you regularly. It is indeed important to talk to each other regularly. Otherwise, your long-distance relationship will no longer be “difficult” but “unlivable” ! If the conditions do not allow you to talk every day, and you have fairly full schedules, share them yourself, and set appointments. 

It’s important to call each other at least once a week so you don’t lose track of events in your partner’s life. Eh yes ! In general, asking about the details he or she told you about the day before counts a lot. All of this should be kept in mind in times when the long-distance relationship is more difficult.

Also find out about the ideal means of communication, because communication tools are less qualitative in certain areas of the world. Then, you will have to choose times when both of you are free,   even with the jet lag, to be able to chat without untimely interruptions.

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Try to see each other regularly

Going the distance will be that much less difficult! It may happen that we are not so far from each other; you can both reside in the same country, but in different cities. In this case, visit regularly, if the distance and your budget allow it. We know how complicated it can be when you are still a student, for example .

If you live in different countries, then it is necessarily more difficult to find each other. Don’t lose hope, and rather than getting depressed thinking how much you miss your loved one,  plan your future reunion! Talk about it together, and in the meantime, call each other on Skype, WhatsApp, send each other photos, small messages, letters… all means are good and will allow you to create an illusion of closeness.

Living as a couple at a distance: Difficult, but only temporary!

I often receive messages saying “ I’m suffering from my long distance relationship” , “It’s too hard”, “I miss him/her  , “I can’t do it anymore” , “I don’t feel strong enough, it’s too complicated now”… No matter how difficult the long distance relationship is, remember that it is only a temporary situation. 

This is a kind of test to pass before you can live with your partner. Sometimes it lasts a few months, sometimes a few years, but in the end you can find yourself for good and never leave each other. And you know what ? Very few people around you will be as tight-knit as you will be. Because you will have waited so long. So do your best to thrive as much as possible despite this situation.

Author: Erika

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